Whiny Wednesday
Written on 9:49 PM by Kristen
Sorry for the scary bad writing, grammar, literary devices etc... but I really don't care.
Once again I find myself alone in my apartment, whilst some tragedy unfolds before my helpless non-handyman hands. The first plot point to this tragedy was the night I moved into my beauty-ful apartment, and the pipe behind the toilet starts leaking all over the floor. Fate provided a foil lasagna pan which held the water until morning light. Then I had to stand around all Saturday morning in my skeezy unshowered moving PJ's while a stranger fixed my toilet. Awkward, Princess.!
Tragedy plot point number two was when the power kept randomly going off in my apartment, like a crafty lightning bug messing with my pizz-ower. No one believed tragic apartment Rapunzel, they accused her of optical delusions. The electricity proceeded to disappear for over 24 hours, a week later, throughout the entire kingdom of "Building 10". Chaos, Calamity, and Cursing could be heard over all the land. Now who's laughing ye snooty apartment office wenches.??
Tonight I sit and await handy dude number 2 to avenge the evil blinky alarm monster.
(handy dude #2 is much younger than handy dude #1 coincidentally)
Prologue:
I have no alarm system set up.
I have no alarm code.
I have no intruders.
My alarm system starts beeping at random intervals for no particular reason during American Idol (well played alarm) ... Then all bazookie breaks loose and it's a wailing siren. Thanks neighbors for coming to check on me (not). Turning the breakers off has absolutely no effect. I call the handy dude helpline which calls me back and instructs me to disconnect the battery in my closet.
FYI to all intruders, go to my closet first to turn off the alarm. Neato. So this battery looks like a small car battery with two connectors on top. Both of them are stuck I discover through my rubber gloves. Hey, I don't wanna die alone and electro-fried lying face down in my Croc's collection.
So handy dude shows up and realizes there's a second part that has to be disconnected. Handy dude doesnt know batteries but he's kinda cute. Handy dude's gonna come replace something on Friday when the part comes in.
I think its a date!
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I like the picture. :) Sorry about all the mishaps. My complex has issues with flooding and cigarette smoke seeping into other people's (my) air ducts. Boooooo!!!!
You and Santana need to write a book y'all are so funny! Thanks to you grafton is still alive I didn't fall asleep holding him I had your hilarious blogs to read. Thanks love ya!
Handyman...handyman...handy- hey I found the light switch.